LOVED LIKE A BABY

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Like a jelly, as soft and wobbly

He danced his way into my heart.

As colorful as could be

He brightened up my life.

I never thought love could be this easy with him

But he made it seem so sweet

Like a baby sucking on a pacifier.

I’m not scared of letting myself go and soaking myself in cry once in a while

Because, I cried on the very shoulders that heard my cry as laughter.

He’s always been there

And even when he’s not by my side,

I feel secured

Knowing that he’d be there the second I called his name.

Take me as I am…

…for I realised that love felt nothing than to be free around the one person who really cared for you.

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SAY NO MORE

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This isn’t what we agreed on

It’s been almost a year, but I quiet remember you told me you’re fine.

I don’t think I did anything wrong these past few days

And I don’t think your heart grew colder too.

So what might have caused this?

Search your heart and tell me how you really feel about me now…

…at least I still have our memories saved right behind my eyes and it keeps flashing before my eyes every now and then.

Did you lie about your feelings towards me…

…or you faked them?

Which ever way, I only think you should have told me about it.

It’s devastating realizing I’ve been in this all alone.

You kept me in the dark all these years and I think that’s an unfair thing to do.

I wish I never met you…

…and now that I did, I wish I never fell in love with you.

LOVE WILL FIND A WAY

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He called my phone at short intervals

I was preoccupied with work and didn’t hear my phone ring…

I did a random check on my phone and saw eight missed calls

I opened and saw the love icon I had saved as his contact on my phone…

…and there I wondered what had happened to my babe.

I called…he answered and sounded as though he was in distress

So I rushed home leaving all I was doing behind.

I got home and it was all lonely, dark and doors unlocked.

I thought to myself, what had happened…

…I entered and just as I was about to switch on the lights

A candle was lit

With my babe down on one knee…

…I’ve waited so long for this, he said

I melted before I could hear the rest of the speech.

And then I finally heard something flash my ears…

…Be my wife.

I just don’t want you for a girlfriend, so I’m asking you to do me the honor of being the Mrs. to my Mr.

I smiled and hugged him…

…the answer I gave, I really don’t remember.

It’s been a year after we said “I do”

Happy Valentines’ Day

BREAK ME…NOT

Break

I’m not writing to show my anger…
No, I’m not even angry right now
Seriously, why should I be?
When all I did was tell the whole world I’ve found “the one”
And then in a split second…
…just as I’m about to show the world what I have,  he bolts away with another.
I won’t consider been treated as the fool…
…neither will I show him how much hurt he caused me.
All I’m trying to do is keep calm and manage not to shed a tear for “that one” who thought he was wiser.
I grew stronger knowing that you could leave just when I had a better idea for us.
Leave, yes please do…because that’s what all cowards do.
I just hope you don’t come back after I have grown that tough skin you actually gave me.
And ask that I share with you the stone cold heart you left me with.
I’ll be fine this way
I have always been and wouldn’t need you coming back as a dynamite to break me down and succumb to that thing called love.
Go, just go…and I pray my heart forgets your name forever!

COUNTING STARS…CHASING RAINBOWS

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A few years back when we met
I was the happiest lady to have ever lived
You were the perfect gentleman in my books
I got so enchanted by your looks
And then I said to myself “I’m never looking back”

Along the line, I shut my eyes
To every other thing in the world
You became the only person I chose to see
And your sweet baritone voice was the only lovely sound I heard
I could deny all truths
Just to listen to your lies
That was because you were the only one I chose to believe
I don’t know who or what changed
And I can’t believe time acted so fast
But I’ve come to realize how deceptive beauty can be
I can’t imagine I’m at the loosing ends again
I thought your words were assuring enough
And your love was never going to fade
Now, I realize I was only counting stars and chasing rainbows.

FIGHTING TEMPTATIONS

WHAT HAPPENED TO LOVE

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Let’s not do it this way
We’ve come a long way to make it so obvious
The date nights
Teasing each other
All-through the night phone calls
The break-up to make-up times
What happened to all of that?
Are we just going to throw them all to the wind and pretend they never happened?
I’ve always had a “man” in you
And I just can’t sit back and watch you disappear without a trace
We were happy together…
…or so I thought
Not until you started acting funny
And getting angry at every little thing I did or said
I felt so comfortable in your arms
And felt safe telling you all my secrets
But you’ve become a stranger in just a twinkle of an eye
And I no longer trust that my heart is safe with you
I thought our love could stand the test of time
And prove to the world what it really means to be loved
But you took me to the peak
Made me feel so wanted
And left my heart crushing down like it didn’t matter at all
I really wish we could give it one more try
Because I just can’t go on with a broken heart
No, let’s get back together and make this work
One more try is all I’m asking for
Cause all I ever wanted was YOU.

 

PAIN THROUGH TIME

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I lost it all…
I can’t count how many obstacles I’ve crossed
One, Two, Three
Or maybe a thousand
I just can’t imagine me at the centre of the game
Playing the cheerleader
And hanging on even when I was the loser
It hadn’t even started before I saw it ending
Everything coming down to a score of zero
I tried to fix things…
A little patch here
And a little stitch there
But I was the one bleeding
I was the one being pierced so hard in the chest
I felt blood gushing out of my throat
Maybe it’s time to walk away…
It’s time I took that walk I should have taken a long time ago
I’m sure it’ll help ease my pain
And nurture my bleeding heart
I don’t know where I’m going from here…
Because his heart was the only place I could call home
And now that it seems I’ve lost it, it’s time I lived in solitude
I may just have to wander…
Keep tossing coins
And making wishes
Till I find another place where my heart could live
And breathe beautifully without bruises
And if I finally have to take a walk through that door
I wish he would realise how much I’ve felt the piercings
How long I’ve endured the pains
And how many scars I’m walking away with.

A NOTE FROM THE EAST

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I received a note…
I don’t know whom it came from
All that was written on it read “From the east side of town”
Cupid hasn’t shot anyone for me there

…Or maybe I’m not aware of that yet
I opened it with glee
And found a rose seed
There was nothing more I could do
Nothing else to trace the recipient with

…So I made a decision
And put the seed in the ground
It started pushing through the soil beautifully
But I still didn’t know whom it had come from
Maybe love found a new way to come say “hi”
And with the rose, make me smile

…Every now and then, I hope for the one who sent me a rose flower in  this form to show his face
But each day passes by and all I see is a growing red rose which came from the East side of town.

WRITINGS ON THE WALL

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I was so caught up in love…

Not for a second did I think I was being manipulated

The little things I did with pleasure seemed numb to me in recent times…

“I can’t breathe without you”, “I can hardly sleep without you by my side”

All those were lines he rehearsed to make me feel special

Yet I never even felt his presence by my side…

It was me making sacrifices and turning down offers just to please him

The usual cravings of a lady from her man was something I could not even dream of…

Romantic night outs are like taboos, I never get a “yes” to them

“I’m busy, the schedule is tight” is all I hear on a daily basis

Whenever I fix a date, it was still me I would find at the table three hours later…

Make him fix one and you don’t show up, it’s like you broke one of the ten commandments

I’m tired, I need a break

But I feel so entangled now that I don’t even know which way shows the exit…

Nothing has ever been fun and pretending to wear a smile is all I have ever done

I admit I leaped too fast

But don’t blame a lady who needed care

And found love at first sight…

My once cherished dream has become a reality so far from me

And it’s so hard to believe

I really need the exit

Because it’s no longer a blurring sight…

There’s just one thing I want him to know, that I loved him in a way no one else would

I made it look perfect, though inside of me was messy

I’ve lived, loved and learned and I wish he does the same…

I would forever hold a bigger portion of my heart for you

Because I bear no hatred against you, but I pray you learn so fast to appreciate things the way they are…

I love you and would always do, no matter what.